Right. So, here is my current list of questions from the past three weeks.
When’s the wedding?
I have no fucking clue. We’ve been engaged for a little over two weeks. We didn’t spend our vacation in Key West with our calendars out.
Will it be big?
I hate people. What do you think?
Did your mother cry?
Why would she? She’s happy of course, but why would she weep for joy?
Do you know who your attendants will be?
Barf.
Other things people have said:
You don’t congratulate the bride, you congratulate the groom.
As this was my grandmother, I bit my tongue.
Oh my gosh, you’re going to be a bride!!!!!!
Actually, I was hoping to be a teacher and a good person and lots of other things… And again, it was a friend who said this and all I could think was, What? What does that even mean? More and more I dislike the b-word. It implies lace and crinoline and white fruffyness and being “given away”–because that’s going to happen!–and all that nonsense I can’t stand.
I went to The Knot (which I won’t link to) and promptly had an aneurysm. My friend Halley’s sister recently got married, and Halley said that her sis got books on “proper wedding etiquette” not just to know what that stuff is, but also as a way to prepare for the onslaughts of “you have to do X”—just so you know where people are coming from. Over a few drinks that sounded like good advice. Staring at the screen, on the Knot’s site, it seemed like horrible advice because apparently I am already five weeks behind schedule. (Halley, I do agree that this is good advice, yet I don’t think I’m ready to examine the rules for “real” weddings.)
And when I told my friend Nick about this, he said, “Oh my god, that sounds like a slipknot, or the knot of a noose or something! ” I think Nick is right on that one. Down with the impersonal checklist and stupid “planning” guides that are really just ads.
This process shouldn’t be a noose. And people should stop asking weird questions.
dude. those websites are scary. at least books don’t have ads blinking at you in pinks and squeals.
when people ask when your wedding is, you should just say, “tomorrow. I figured we’d order a few pizzas and turn on the ipod. what do you think?”
By: Halley on June 27, 2007
at 3:06 pm
You’ll make it yours. Just remember the wedding is for you and John and sharing the moment with your closest.
And yes–The Knot is scary.
By: jadepark on June 29, 2007
at 4:23 pm